Bullying is a big problem. It can make kids feel hurt, scared, sick, lonely, embarrassed and sad. Bullies might hit, kick, or push to hurt people, or use words to call names, threaten, tease, or scare them. A bully might say mean things about someone, grab a kid’s stuff, make fun of someone, or leave a kid out of the group on purpose. Some bullies threaten people or try to make them do things they don’t want to do.
Bullying is a big problem that affects lots of kids. Three-quarters of all kids say they have been bullied or teased. Being bullied can make kids feel really bad. The stress of dealing with bullies can make kids feel sick.
Bullying can make kids not want to play outside or go to school. It’s hard to keep your mind on schoolwork when you’re worried about how you’re going to deal with the bully near your locker. Bullying bothers everyone — and not just the kids who are getting picked on. Bullying can make school a place of fear and can lead to more violence and more stress for everyone.
Helping Kids Deal with Bullies
1. A common contributing factor to bullying is a lack of effective supervision or guidance of young people in school settings. If recurring incidences of taunting are happening on school grounds to one or more children parents often need to find out what personnel is supposed to be supervising at the particular time and place that the problem occurs.
2. Once a parent has some details and if they have a good relationship with one or more administrators or teachers they are often able to discreetly tell staff members what is going on and ask for help. Skilled school personnel can usually figure out how to intervene in ways that do not reveal the source of their information. It is important to locate people who can be discreet as a child’s fears about retribution are certainly not unwarranted suppose
3. It is also helpful to remember that bullies can be suffering from stress or parental absence in their homes. Once informed, schools can offer children who are “acting out” towards others guidance, support or counseling. Such services can make a difference in the short and long term behavior of the children involved. ed to be supervising at the particular time and place that the problem occurs.
4. Unfortunately schools do always have the resources to supervise or offer good counsel to troubled students. In this case parents can try to identify even one adult on staff who might keep an “eye out” for their child. If a child who is being targeted has a watchful teacher or counselor who can intervene when possible and/or offer a shoulder to lean on when things are tough it can help. Parents can also feel less alone with the problem if they have someone to keep in touch with on a regular basis in the school.
5. Giving support to a “victimized” child at home can also be helpful. Parents naturally become alarmed at reports of consistent taunting and teasing. It can be hard for a Mom or Dad to listen to their child recounts all of the “gory” details of the incidents you describe without getting upset. However, if parents can manage to listen to stories and sympathize with difficulties in a relatively calm way it can help a child “get out the stress” and feel more relaxed at the end of a long day.
6. Sometimes parents are quick to offer solutions to complicated problems. Parental suggestions can be useful but it can also be helpful for Mom and Dad to elicit their child’s thoughts about possible ways to solve major challenges such as how to handle bullies. If Mom or Dad can help their child produce a few of their own solutions it can build their confidence and self-esteem
7. Sometimes including adult friends, relative and other children who have witnessed or survived incidents of bullying in family discussions can help as well. “Putting a number of heads together” to generate possible solutions can produce a variety of ideas that can help.
Posted in Children’s Behavior
It can be challenging for parents to sort through ways to get thoughtful help from their child’s school and/or to offer days or weeks of consistent support and encouragement to their child but this kind of ongoing attention and understanding can shift even difficult situations like bullying to a good resolution.